The Road Not Chosen

In Other Words

"They gave our Master a crown of thorns. Why do we hope for a crown of roses?"
~ Martin Luther ~  

Matthew 27 tells the story of Jesus appearance before Pontius Pilate. After Jesus fate has been decided he is handed over to the Roman soldiers who make a crown of thorns, place it on his head, and begin to mock him. As he stands there, the weakest yet strongest of men, I often have wondered if it was difficult to not call down the hosts of heaven to slaughter those soldiers and save him from their lashes. I am quite sure that is what I would have done! We know that Jesus did indeed endure this mocking & beating, understanding that it was truly going to get worse before it got better.

Heb 12:2-3 exhorts us to "... fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured such opposition from sinful men, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart." I have gone through many seasons in my life when I have wrapped these verses around me like a blanket. As a young Christian I was often confused when people would become angry when I tried to tell them about this wonderful gift of Jesus that I had just found. Later on in my journey, I learned to hit my knees and ask for grace to endure when a particular co-worker was endlessly cruel & hated me so much (by her own admission)that she only communicated to me through notes left on my desk. (Our desks were right next to each other, by the way.) I tried many times to break through her walls, finally coming to the understanding that it was not to be. The day I left that job she walked me to my car & broke down in tears, saying she wasn't sure why she had acted that way. I was able to forgive her because I knew Christ had forgiven me for all the horrible things I had done to him in my past.

Even though I have had these experiences, and many more like them, it seems that too often I am taken by surprise when the thorns of life prick at me and even entangle me. It's as if I have forgotten that we are to be like Christ, to share in His sufferings as well as His glory. Just a few months ago, as my son lay horribly ill in the hospital, I came to the abrupt realization that I was ticked off at God. I thought God would let Evan off the hook, that he wouldn't have to share those sufferings because he has Down Syndrome. Yet no Christian is exempt. And why should we be? Christ is our example, we are to follow him in all things, even this.

Human nature being what it is, soft, lazy, frail, we want, hope, plead and beg for the crown of roses. A life full of just blessings, as if we already lived in heaven and not on earth. I remind myself that roses, sweet and fragrant, come with the thorns attached, just as the Christian life, full of blessing, beauty and wonder, comes with its own painful cost. There is a wonderful song my husband wrote called "To Carry The Glory". Here are some of the lyrics, which I think perfectly sum up what our lives are all about:

It is no longer I who live, but Christ who is living in me

For the life that I now live, I live by the faith of the Son of God

Who loved me and gave Himself for me

It's the God Who made light to shine from darkness

Who is shining in our hearts

To give the light of the knowledge of the glory of God

In the face of Jesus Christ

What earthly cost could be too great a price

How could there be too great a sacrifice

To carry the glory of God in the earth, To carry the glory of God in the earth

To carry the glory of God in the earth, as He's shining through our lives

              1997, Harold Forbis, Used by permission.

                              All rights reserved

 

 

Fashionable Jesus

"If I'd abandon all that seeks to make my faith informed and chic, could You, would You, show Yourself to me?"
~ Nichole Nordeman~

The religious world is awash in politically current trends these days: Eco-Christianity, Pro-Choice Christianity, churches ordaining & celebrating homosexuality, I could go on for quite a while. But I won't. I was talking to my Language Arts class a couple of weeks ago about Humanism which has been seeping into the Church for ages, but has really picked up popularity since the Renaissance. So called Christian Humanism of the time (and even now) says "I accept the teachings of Jesus as being good rules to live by yet I don't believe in miracles, prophesy or any supernatural manifestations of a higher power."  This thought pervades many denominations today and creeps into our own theology in ways that can sometimes not be easily detected.

Paul told Timothy in 2 Timothy 4:

For a time is coming when people will no longer listen to sound and wholesome teaching. They will follow their own desires and will look for teachers who will tell them whatever their itching ears want to hear. They will reject the truth and chase after myths. But you should keep a clear mind in every situation. Don’t be afraid of suffering for the Lord. Work at telling others the Good News, and fully carry out the ministry God has given you.

How often have we "oooh'd" and "aaaah'd" over the most recent Christian best-seller or "hot" sermon? Are books & sermons bad in and of themselves? Not always but we can tend to be so drawn to the coolest and hippest whatever that we lose sight of what we are to measure everything against: the Word of God. The Bible, ancient as it is, can sometimes loom as dusty & not relevant to this modern age. However, it is the plumb  line that we are to use in deciding what it truth and what is deception. To those who try to pick & choose which parts of the Bible they believe are God-inspired and which aren't, I always reply that if God can create the universe He is surely capable of keeping His instruction book to humans intact, all of it!

God wants us to have a faith that will go against the grain of popular culture, if popular culture is against the Word of God. As Paul, about to be killed for his faith, told Timothy: "Don't be afraid of suffering for the Lord." Nichole Nordeman's words at the top of this entry are so relevant to all of us. I don't want to have a faith that is politically correct and modern. Instead, I want a faith that is Biblically correct and wrapped around the Ancient of Days. Then, and only then, will I really see God.

"A husband is a guy who tells you when you’ve got on too much lipstick and helps you with your girdle when your hips stick.."
~ Ogden Nash ~

There is a curved glass frame that has sat on the night table next to our bed for the last 24 years. What could be so precious that it’s been in the same place that long? Pictures from our wedding day. I love those three pictures, taken in soft focus, of me gazing up at my husband, our faces getting closer in each picture, and kissing in the last one. We look stunningly, deliriously happy, our future spread out before us like a wonderful banquet just waiting to be enjoyed.

If you have been married more than say, oh, five years, you know that there are days when the food at that banquet seems to have gotten moldy or a little stale at best. There are days when I look at those wedding pictures and think, “Who are those young people? “and “Was my jaw line ever really that tight and was Harold’s hair really that jet black?” Time goes by and eats away at our bodies. (Well, unless you have a lot of money and a great plastic surgeon!) If we aren’t diligent it can eat away at our relationship also, making us feel bored and listless with the one we once were so crazy about.

I have found that the best way to keep our marriage fresh is laughter. Harold and I can crack each other up with just a word. Believe me, the longer we are married, the funnier things become around here. Example: I ask my husband for the fifth time what it was that happened to so-and-so. He looks at me with a raised eyebrow and replies, “Ummm, I think I’ve told you that several times already.” Just then it pops back into my head. “Oh. A-ha! I remember now!” Or Harold misplaces his keys for the qazillionth time. We embark on a frantic, Keystone cops, chase around the house looking for them, finding them on a shelf in the bathroom. When you both get older and your mind isn’t quite the amazing keeper of information it used to be, you have to either laugh or go get an attorney and call it quits. Believe me; humor is much cheaper and much healthier than the alternative.

After this long, we have seen each other at our best and our worst. Experience has taught us each other’s strengths and weaknesses and we do our best to be respectful of those. When I am angry, Harold knows how long it takes for it to pass. When he is cranky, I can fairly quickly figure out a way to help him feel better. My husband and I are each other’s biggest cheerleaders and woe be to the person who comes against one of us! Over time God has knit us together in a way that is amazing and wonderful to behold.

Let me make one thing clear about that last sentence. We didn’t just wake up one day and say, “Oh, look, we are so strong and bonded together! How cool is that?!” No, it has taken years of labor, tears, talks, kisses, prayer, and perseverance. We have had to work with the Lord to make this marriage last. There was a time during our 7^th year when I considered calling it quits. I am so grateful that I hung on! To think of all the things I would have missed out on makes me want to weep. God has always been our rock and consolation during the tough times. (To all you young’uns: tough times will come. Be prepared and make sure your marriage is built on the rock of Christ, not the changing sands of emotion and physical attraction.)

That quote at the top? Here’s how it works in our house. On Saturday night Harold gets his clothes together for Sunday morning. There are two questions he asks me almost every time: “Do these shoes go with these pants?” and “Does this shirt go with these pants?” After years of wondering why he always asks me this (it’s not like his wardrobe is so massive he forgets what goes with what) it dawned on me that my husband just wants to know two things. The first is that I will gladly help him with even the most mundane of decisions and the other is that I find him handsome, gray hair and all. And I still need to know that he finds me as lovely as the day we married. Even if I do go from honey blonde to medium auburn hair like I did last week on a whim. (Does he like it? The jury’s still out on that one!) Marriage: be honest, serve one another, and love each other and God. Till death do you part.

Check out "In Other Words" at Christian Women Online for more articles!

In Other Words…

"There are two kinds of people: those who say to God, 'Thy will be done,' and those to whom God says, 'All right, then, have it your way.'"~ C.S. Lewis ~

Does anyone remember the Burger King ad with the catchy tune “Have it your way, have it your way at Burger King today”? Too often it seems that is the slogan we have adopted as American Christians. We want to have church our way: a beautiful building, cutting edge children’s ministry, youth group with a terminally hip & cool leader, a sermon with a dynamic Power Point presentation that lasts no longer than 30 minutes. Oh and don’t forget a worship team that is so kickin’ they should have record labels fighting over them!

The Bible should be our guide book for every aspect of our lives. When examining the New Testament scriptures does any of the above fit in? Is that what the Church should look like? There is nothing wrong with a nice building, etc. but what motivates the leaders and people of that local body makes all the difference. The focus should be on building the Kingdom of God with all the sacrifice and work that may entail, not creating our own little church kingdom on the earth.

Harold & I were watching a Christian talk show last night where a pastor from a rural area was being put on the spot by someone with a large ministry because he had turned down offers to be “promoted” to a larger city. This pastor loved his rural region, felt called there, and was having a great impact there. Yet it made no sense to the “city pastor”. “Doesn’t God show His approval by moving you on to a bigger work?” he asked.

We often think bigger is better, more influential, more “blessed”. One of the basic facts of Jesus ministry on earth was that it was small. He had 12 (well, really 11) committed disciples and a larger group of 70 followers. To many, a church of 83 people would not be considered successful. Yet there were enough committed people to change the world. Enduring persecution, they held church services in caves. They shed blood, were tortured, and often died for their faith. There is nothing glamorous in earthly terms about that kind of Christian life, yet it is the kind of life experienced by millions of our brothers & sisters even to this day.

I wonder what would happen if the church in America stopped wanting it their way and started asking God how He wants the church to look in this nation. Is it right for the church to spend more time & resources on themselves than caring for those who desperately need to see and feel the touch of Jesus in their lives? Our children would learn more about real life and about God by spending time volunteering in a soup kitchen or nursing home than on youth group trips with no Christ focus.

I want to invest my life and train my child in the things that really count for something, things that will last for eternity. When the day comes that I stand before God and He judges my actions, I want more gold accumulated than hay. To that end may I wake up each morning and say “God, thy will be done. Lord, have it your way.”

In Other Words

"When life whacks you so hard your head flies off, sew it back on and keep going." ~ Mary Pierce ~

There is this perception among some people that those of us who have special needs children are super parents. Look! Up in the sky! It’s a bird, it’s a plane, it’s special needs parent! Faster than a speeding bullet, able to leap tall mounds of paperwork in a single bound. Right. That’s me.

I will now admit to a terrible personal failing: I only pretend to be that parent. I am an expert at looking brave, seemingly composed and capable in the face of sometimes overwhelming circumstances. Taking on incompetent medical personnel without breaking a sweat seems to others like something I was born able to do.

There are times when I am prideful enough to believe I can do it. Alone. That is when I usually get blindsided, knocked almost into next Tuesday, as my grandma used to say. And yes, my head does fly off. But I cannot sew it back on myself. I’d like to think I was capable of such a feat, but God in His mercy keeps me from doing it all myself.

Along comes my friend. Noticing that something is missing from me, she starts to look about until she finds the lost part. Picking it up, dusting it off, she takes out needle and thread made strong by the Word of God. Stitch by sometimes painful stitch, she patiently sews me back together. For good measure she pours oil over my head and it soaks into my skin, bringing healing and peace and joy.

Then and only then can I keep going in the strength that comes not from my own efforts, but strength that comes from being kept whole by the love and faithfulness of my friends and an Almighty God.

The Spirit of the Lord is on Me; because Jehovah has anointed Me to preach the Gospel to the poor; He has sent Me to bind up the broken-hearted, to proclaim liberty to the captives, and the opening of the prison to those who are bound; to preach the acceptable year of the Lord and the day of vengeance of our God; to comfort all who mourn; to appoint to those who mourn in Zion, to give to them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the mantle of praise for the spirit of heaviness; so that they might be called trees of righteousness, the planting of the Lord, that He might be glorified. (Isaiah 61:1 -3)

*This entry is part of the “In Other Words” meme sponsored every Tuesday by Christian Women Online. Please click the link below for more information and links to other entries.