What To Say, Feel, Think

In reflecting about last week's events, I have come to the conclusion that I am stumped. Maybe dumbfounded would be a better word. Or one of these: agape, amazed, astonished, blown away, bowled over, flabbergasted, floored, overcome, overwhelmed, puzzled, shocked, speechless, staggered, startled, stunned, surprised, taken aback.

It is for me almost an odd thing that God chose to move on my son the way that He did. We didn't expect it or even really specifically pray for it. Does that show a lack of faith & expectancy on my part? Perhaps. Perhaps not. God is after all sovereign, moving when and as He chooses.

I can say that I knew without a doubt that God would get us through whatever challenges lay before us. Never did I think that He would leave us in the valley of despair. Even in the darkest of times, and there have been for me some of the most horrible times of my life during this, that bit of hope that can never truly be extinguished from the Christian's heart, shimmered at the distant end of our black tunnel.

So here we are as a family, feeling as if we've been picked up and moved forward in time several weeks. It's as if I have a spot of amnesia & am trying to remember what that last surgery-that-never-happened was like. It should have happened. I should have the memory of it. Yet it's not there and that has left me feeling (pick one of the words from the list above!)

We are most certainly grateful for this great mercy God has shown Evan. We have received wonderful letters, phone calls, e-mail's, etc. from people who are rejoicing with us. The testimony of this event is spreading & all the glory is going to God, which is worth it all.

I told my friend, Sherry, that I keep thinking I should be over the stunned sense of it all, but I just don't feel like I can rush past this event in our lives. It will take time for me to absorb and comprehend  (as much as one can) this wonderful blessing from our Father. So I'm in no hurry. I plan just to sit and ponder for awhile, for I know there are lessons to be learned at this spot on our journey down the road not chosen.

Comments

[Jessica]

I'm still amazed too, it's amazing how the Lord works!

[Julana]

Lori,
I'm so glad for all of you.

[Pat Kirk]

It's time for you to have some sit and ponder time.

[Eleanor]

Isn't it cool how the road not chosen sometimes takes us down a path that is better than we would have chosen for ourselves? Praise God!

[Stephanie S]

Lori, As I read your post I kept thinking 'yes, yes, that's exactly how I felt about being able to be home as a family with James for the last two and a half weeks. I was very mindful when we left that there was every chance we could be back for some complication, but the Lord was wonderfully merciful and let us have the entire time together. His mercies are truly new every morning (though, truly, I walk in His mercies better some mornings than others!)

Enjoy your pondering time, I'm sure you will long treasure this miracle in your heart!

[Stephanie S]

Lori, As I read your post I kept thinking 'yes, yes, that's exactly how I felt about being able to be home as a family with James for the last two and a half weeks. I was very mindful when we left that there was every chance we could be back for some complication, but the Lord was wonderfully merciful and let us have the entire time together. His mercies are truly new every morning (though, truly, I walk in His mercies better some mornings than others!)

Enjoy your pondering time, I'm sure you will long treasure this miracle in your heart!