"If winter comes, can spring be far behind?" Percy Bysshe Shelly
It is sometimes difficult to imagine, berated by cold winds and gray, bitter days, that in a short time the earth will be filled once more with warmth and greenery. Many days I longed to be taken out of the deep freeze of the Midwest and deposited on the sunny California seashore where I grew up. Tired of short days, deprived of my needed daily requirement of UV rays, my temper seemed to dip lower with the falling mercury of the thermometer.
I remember a cold, winter day in (oddly enough) California, three weeks after Evan's January 21 birth. Sitting on my bed, looking out the window at the dormant bushes in our yard, tears slid down my cheeks. I felt beat-to-a-pulp-dead inside. Life seemed like it would be wretched forever.
Quietly God spoke to my heart. "Without winter, there is no spring. Without death, there is no life. Spring will come again and joy will return to your soul." I don't know that I really believed Him in that moment, in all honesty. It seemed easy for Him to say, after all He was in control of everything and I was clearly in control of not one thing it seemed.
Again, God spoke. "What you sow does not come to life unless it dies." (1 Cor. 15:36) At that I began a journey which would help me understand that I had to let my selfish desires die, plant that shriveled seed in the ground, water it with my faith & hope in God, and wait to see His desire for my life sprout up. But first I would have to endure the winter.
Nineteen years later, I can say that spring has come, full of beauty, color and laughter. Also, winter has come, over and over. But I know now, as the poet said, if winter comes, spring is just around the corner.
My lover said to me, "Rise up, my darling!
Come away with me, my fair one!
Look, the winter is past, and the rains are over and gone.
The flowers are springing up,
the season of singing birds has come,
and the cooing of turtledoves fills the air.
Song of Solomon 2:10-12
Great thoughts, thanks for the reminder!
Posted by: Kilikina | January 22, 2007 at 09:11 AM
These winters are hard, even for those of us who grew up with them. I'd love to fly off to FL!
Posted by: Julana | January 22, 2007 at 10:07 AM