Staples

Whew! What an ordeal. Evan got his 28 staples removed from his 7 inch surgical incision on Monday. I'd love to say it was a breeze but... I will say that I have an amazing husband who undertook this ordeal without me, wishing to spare me. Harold and our good friend, Roger, helped Evan through this difficult time. We had hoped that the numbing cream & Valium would make things easier for Evan, but that didn't happen.

Here is the difficult thing about writing about your special needs child. How honest should one be? Last year when my mother & I were discussing my writing, she exhorted me to "always tell the real truth". One of the reasons I started this blog nearly 4 years ago, was to give people a real glimpse of what it is like to raise a special needs child, highs and lows included. It really isn't right to paint a sunny picture when dark clouds are the reality.

So here is the reality of the first paragraph...it took 4 people to hold down my terrified, crying son in order to get the staples out. It tore Harold & Roger up, and moved the nurses & office staff near to tears. There was an option to put Evan under general anesthesia, but people with Down Syndrome are high risk when it comes to anesthesia. So the safest option health-wise was to hold him down. Before people start inundating me with "but shouldn't they have sedated him?" let me say that past experience has taught us that Evan's adrenaline can override the stiffest dose of tranquilizers and leave him unsettled for days. Oddly enough, as soon as it was all over Evan was happy as a clam and wanting to go out to eat. So they did. He has been happy since then, with no lingering fears over the incident. Harold & Roger will probably need therapy though!

The last 16 days since Evan's surgery have been long ones. There has been little sleep, sore backs from having to lift Evan the first week or so, as he could not stand or walk on his own, and the looming specter of me at 80 and Evan at 50. Some of our friends have understood the trial we have been going through these past days & others fail to grasp the physical & emotional difficulty of caring for a 150 lb. mentally retarded teenager who is in pain and can't walk. What would we do without God's help? What would we have done without the meals provided by our friends? What would Evan have done without his friends from school coming by to visit & sending cards? I shudder to think. At least Evan is now able to get around with a walker in a limited way & has been to school for a couple of hours yesterday & today. The end of this road is finally in sight.

On the subject of long term care for special needs kids, Barbara Curtis at Mommy Life has had a couple of really good posts on this subject here and here in the last day or two. As the cliche goes, I don't know what the future holds, but I know who holds the future. And I'm glad He does!

Comments

[Molly]

Ohhhh, I'm so sorry it was such an ordeal afterall. We will continue to pray for Evan's recovery, and for strength and grace for you and Harold. We love you.

[Julana]

Lori,

I'm so sorry for how hard that was for Evan. I just hate going through medical procedures where Nicholas has to be in pain, for his own good.
I'm so glad he recovered so quickly. I hope you all have a great Christmas, especially Evan.

[Eleanor]

Still praying for Ev, and we'll add Harold and Roger to the list! :) See you guys soon!

[Rebecca P.]

Lori,

I am so sorry Evan had such an experience. I know I am getting to this post late. I hope that he is doing much better now.

The age factor, yes, it gets to me as well.